24-7 communities and marriage

I’m doing a wedding this week, it got me thinking about marriage in general. When 24-7 prayer started out there were loads of young single people now there are loads of young married couples. I’ve been married 18 years this year and also as a pastor of a church I have witnessed all sorts of marital blessings and stresses over the years. So here are a few thoughts on marriage.


1. Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church, laying his life down for her. This is where I have seen some marriages go worng. A husband is not willing to lay down his life for the sake of his wife. He will not cease his business travel or re adjust his career path for the sake of his wife, He will not lay down his traveling ministry for the sake of his wife, He will not alter his social life for the sake of his wife, basically he will not lay down his life for the sake of his wife…. Then when it all starts to fall apart incompatability is cited as one of the major reasons for break up. Or the wife finds someone who is around and is willing to sacrifice a bit of themselves to be with her. Self and selfishness destroy marriages.

2. Man or woman work hard, come in tired, veg out in front of the TV, have a brief chat about the day, read the paper, make a few phonecalls, check facebook, go to bed and doze off tired and disinterested. Wife or husband drops children of at school meets someone on the school run who isn’t tired who listens to them and has time for them, soon thoughts drift to "what if they where the one?" they are more attentive, more interested, more fun then stuff happens. “we talk for hours, without running out of things to say”……the same can happen to the partner at work; he/she works with a member of the opposite sex 8 hours a day 5 days a week they talk loads, they soon run out of trivial things to share and end up sharing deeper stuff before you know it you have a potential situation on your hands. Man comes home to stressed out wife who has been wrestling with two children all day, she’s tired harassed and just needs to off load, quickly he compares her to the interesting woman at work and before you know it an affair is born.

3. Men who have affairs always say “the sex is great” of course it is… but relationships aren’t solely birthed in sex. Rob Parsons says that in early relationships the sex is always great but in about 3 years time you’re going to come home from work and your new partner is going to say “have you put the bins out?” .

4. A growing area where affairs are born is over the phone or on the internet, facebook, skype, texts can all get a bit flirty. Even voice conversations can get out of hand. The power of the internet for fueling fantasy is immense and small sparks of overtly flirtatious friendly behaviour online can soon start a fire.

5. Most affairs happen in the mind before they physically take place, with men more often than not it is lust, with women it is often a fantasy, not purely sexual more imagining another existence! More women used to use chat rooms pretending to be other people than men!

I don’t know why I wanted to put all this out there, but if you are considering an affair right now. Can I just say it is messy and people will be get hurt. I might try and put some tips up tomorrow about how to keep it fresh.

Light

This is my favourite passage in the bible, I memorized it in the King James version as a child and i still like this version best, the English is beautiful, however the meaning and impact of this passage is more beautiful than the mere words that try to express it.


"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.

The same was in the beginning with God.

All things were made by him; and without him was not any thing made that was made.

In him was life; and the life was the light of men.

And the light shineth in darkness; and the darkness comprehended it not.

There was a man sent from God, whose name was John.

The same came for a witness, to bear witness of the Light, that all men through him might believe.

He was not that Light, but was sent to bear witness of that Light.

That was the true Light, which lighteth every man that cometh into the world.

He was in the world, and the world was made by him, and the world knew him not.

He came unto his own, and his own received him not.

But as many as received him, to them gave he power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on his name:

Which were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of God.

And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us, (and we beheld his glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father,) full of grace and truth."

Boat House

I love these old boat houses, many are semi carved into the wall. Now a days you are as likely to find someone storing there summer speed boat in one of these as you are a fishing boat.



The deterioration from sun and salt has given this door a particular beauty.



Hope you've enjoyed the snaps this week?

Peace

I went for a beautiful walk ay Cala Comte yesterday with Bruce, it was really so peaceful and re-energising. I took quite a few shots, but more than the photos came away with an overwhelming sense of peace.

I read this this morning "One of the great human pursuits is true peace: the freedom to relax without being weighed down by fears and concerns. This is the peace that God promises those who follow Him. "



Paul said this "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."



Ghandi said “Each one has to find his peace from within. And peace to be real must be unaffected by outside circumstances.”



Jesus said this "But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you. Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid."




For to us a child is born,
to us a son is given,
and the government will be on his shoulders.
And he will be called
Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.



"The LORD bless you
and keep you;

the LORD make his face shine upon you
and be gracious to you;

the LORD turn his face toward you
and give you peace." '

It was a peaceful day, I hope you have one to

bibles

We have such a lot of preparation for the summer to get through that it's keeping us pretty busy. We really want to go to another level of organisation and effectiveness this year.

One of the things is the 24-7 Ibiza Bible, someone has donated £2000 to kick the project off, but that still leaves me £8000 to raise. This will get us 5000 bibles, with our own cover blurb and design. I am going to sell half of them, with the strap line of every one you buy we will give another one away for free.

I like the idea of putting Bibles directly into peoples hands. It cuts out the middle man, the person who has to explain it, it allows people direct contact with truth. The word can speak for itself.

This of course won't be an impersonal random hand out, this will be in an area that we will have spent 6 summers in, this is us giving out bibles to people we know and people who know us. It should be fun.

Stimulated

One of the things I love about Ibiza is the great coffee you get. I am not a coffee snob, I will have instant coffee first thing in the morning, but when I am out and about I enjoy a cortado or a cafe solo. A cafe solo is basically and expresso and a cortado is an expresso with added warm milk.

I remember once doing an interview with a christian magazine, they asked me, what sustained me? and foolishly I replied "Red Bull" I think they were looking for something a little more spiritual!

I wonder if we all need a little stimulation from time to time, more of the Holy Spirit for instance. Has anyone else ever wondered how that really works? "More Lord" has often been the cry of the western church what do we mean by that? Have we not got enough already? Are we using what we have? (thats of course if you treat the Holy Spirit like some form of coffee!) "More Lord" for what? So we can feel better? Feel closer to God? what's the "More" all about if we don't use it?

Sometimes I want to shout "Closer Lord" I don't want more of God I want to feel closer to God who already dwells in me! Does that make sense?

"More Lord' sounds greedy.....

I'm off for a coffee, you should check out this great little article at On Coffee it made me laugh.

Is frustration the birthplace of vision?

Hope you like this one? I was just testing the macro settings!

Every week I meet with Bruce and Tracy we work through a set of questions. One of those questions is "Have I withheld forgiveness, remained frustrated or damaged another person with my words? "

Now two of these subjects, withholding forgiveness and damaging people with your words, are relatively easy to call or be called on. Remaining frustrated is harder.

Is it right to remain frustrated? I once heard someone say that "Frustration is the birthplace of vision" I think he should have said "one of the birth places of vision" or " can be the birthplace of vision".

Frustration that goes unchecked can quickly turn to bitterness, resentment and anger. You're frustrated that your life isn't going anywhere you either get bitter and resentful that you don't get the breaks, or you allow the frustration to drive you to change.

Wilberforce was frustrated with slavery, Mother Teresa was frustrated with destitution, Bob Geldolf was frustrated with the Ethiopian famine, out of their frustration came change. Therefore leaving me to ponder does God allow us to become frustrated in order that we affect change?

If we bring it down a few levels, people can frustrate you, organisations, institutions and even the church can be great sources of frustration. It's what we do with that frustration that matters, do we get fresh energy, fresh drive to bring about change or do we allow our frustration to grow? Frustration can be spread in much the same way as vision, one person gets it and then expresses it with passion to someone else. Frustration can soon spread throughout an organisation or a church like a rather out of control virus. The biggest problem being that people of different maturity levels get infected with the same levels of frustration and then responses to said frustration can be all over the show, breeding disunity, apathy, bitterness and eventually, in extreme cases, death.

If you are in a place of frustration my advice would be allow it to birth vision not spread despair.