Friday, June 16, 2006

Shallow Eating Disorder.

Okay, I guess I asked for it, thanks for the anonymous posts. I guess I was just trying to be honest. We have all done things that we keep secret. I am tempted to post some more of mine, but that would be scary, especially if I had a few nasty anonymous posts. How far can you go with a blog? I do believe in openess but we have to feel safe. Do I feel safe enough..

Well, I have been honest about the smoking and the giving up drink. I still suck on the devils finger but have given up drinking the devils vomit. (that sounds so much better)

Here's one of my more shallow struggles:

Wierdly I struggle with some strange things, please don't laugh:

I can't sit in a room if someone is eating cornflakes. Actually I really struggle eating breakfast with others full stop, it's something I need to do alone. I will eat with others if I have to because I don't want to be rude when visiting people, but in an ideal world we should all have sound proof cubicles for eating breakfast in. Maybe it's because my Dad was a noisy eater or we used to have cornflakes on sundays in Prison and I couldn't get out of it...

Spaghetti bolognese makes me physically gag, but I can eat bolognese without spaghetti, and spaghetti without bolognese!

If someone is crunching loudly, crisps, sweets, salad etc.. I barely cope. I moved train carriages a few months ago because a man was crunching sweets a few seats up.

I can't share forks, knives, bottles or eat food others have touched.

If I am making a sandwich, I use one knife to butter the bread, one knife to put the jam or spread on and another knife to cut the bread.

I only like to use cutlery at home that I know we have personally bought.

Slurping is positively evil, which means I can only eat oranges, peaches and juicy pears, etc when I am totally alone.

Also not to sure about public ice cream eating I am uncomfortable with it but if it's hot will push through the pain and get one with it.

In large groups I keep my eyes down whilst eating and only look up once finished.

By the way I hide this all very well. Many of my friends will never have noticed.

It sounds wierd but it's very managable, is there a name for my condition?


jonah said...

OBC? Obsessive Compulsive Disorder??

No, seriously... I think these are just silly things that we all have at some level. As long as they don't get anti-social and keep you from relationship with others, its totally inconsequential.

I will be sure to leave the corn flakes at home when I come visit. I do understand the needing to eat breakfast alone. I often need the same thing, but in a different way. I go out for breakfast (its just an Andalucian thing to do), so there are loads of people around. But I like to be able to sit, read my paper, sip my coffee and eat my tostada in peace. I don't wanna talk to anyone, hear about anyone's problems or deal with anything at all. Just chill. It rarely happens, but that's my preference.

chris Jones said...

how do you deal with the in my house if i outlawed these things id have a mutiny! lol!

Carlos said...

there was this time when a friend of mine would come and he would ask me for water with ice cubes. After he finished his water he began crunching the ice. One day I swear I was so close to punch him in the face... the on another day I chased him out of my room with an iron stick. Now, for the sake of sanity I do not keep ice cubes at home.

Brian Heasley said...

thanks guys I am not alone.. the boys are okay I have trained them well but don't eat breakfast with them. It's to messy.

indya said...

Three knives for one sandwich??! That one made me laugh :-)

markus said...

Brian, I seriously should connect you with my wife. She uses 2-3 knives too per meal. And I am not allowed to make ANY sound. I write this with the last power I have, because I only weight 50 pounds anymore.